Tuesday, January 27, 2009
School's started. We're into the third week of lessons now and lectures, especially bio lectures have already left me desperately treading water to stay afloat. That's really bad. :( The first week of school felt like we were already months into the school term, probably cos of MSAs. Speaking about MSAs, my results are so bad that I don't even plan onj letting my mom know. SIGH. I'm just thankful that it's not counted for the As. Really really will need to work hard and ask more to if I wanna ace my As. It's a dream, make that a goal. A really tough one at that but I really want to give my all into it, before I even think of raising the white flag. And I have got to do that with God. My number one and greatest resolution for this year is to allow God to be BIGGER in my life. It sounds really simple, letting God reign in my life...It's like we always sing songs that declare that we would go to the ends of the world for God, to do this and to do that, but do we really mean what we sing? I think that's the question we all have to answer at some point in time. I know I'm so totally guilty of making empty promises to God, sometimes even trying to play hero and take matters into my own hands, make Godless decisions. And so, now because God has made me realise these dreadful attitude of mine that He so undeserves, I'm going to make this a challenge for myself. I want my life to be one that glorifies Him, that pleases Him, that screams "GOD RULES"! I want to be able to say, at the end of 2009, that I've grown, not older or taller (though I wish I will! >_<), but also spiritually. I want to be closer to Him so that I can hear His voice.
I don't want to be drifting in and out of life anymore. I don't want to just be caught up with the question marks and anxiety lectures, tests and exams fill me with. I don't want to be conscious of my wrongdoing yet refuse to do something positive about it, just becuase I'm too afraid to face up to it.
I want to live a life that gives Him, the Almighty One, my Utmost for His Highest.
It's not going to be easy. So Lord, I pray that in this new year, may You guide all my thoughts , words and actions, that they may be a blessing unto your Name. Help me honour my promises to You as how You'll honour the promises You made to me and to us all. Lord, please be with me always and keep me close and grounded in Your word and Your love.
Loving You always 'cause You first loved me,
Child of the Most High,
Tamlyn
changeme.
9:24 PM